the joys of summertime

Today was the first day that I actually felt the sun fry my little skin off and it felt so good. Laikyn and I both got burnt. I forgot that babies need sunscreen ... sorry laikers.  (I guess adults need it to. Personally, I think it's overrated.) But in all seriousness, I am so happy the sun came out today and that the wind stayed home!! But somebody else came out to play. My worst nemesis: a bee, an oh-so-NOT friendly bee.

Never lay on a floral blanket to suntan. ever.  The ironic thing about it though is that earlier that day when Mark and I were playing some tennis there were tons of firebugs and bees swarming around me. I tried my darndest not to freak out, and I came out successful. No joke you guys, I literally had the thought go through my mind that I wasn't going to throw a hissy fit this summer about bugs. I am stronger than them and bigger than them. They cannot hurt me.

I lied to myself.

So on the floral blanket I lay, Laikyn was sitting next to me, and Mark was chipping some golf balls in our yard.  I decided to turn over for something, or maybe decided to sit up? Honestly, I don't remember. All I can remember is that what happened next was painful. I squished a bee between the back side of my arm and the side of my ribs. Holy crap, did it ever hurt! It's still stinging as I sit here and write this post some 3 hours later. The back of the arm is such a tender spot. If you ever want to hurt somebody and do some damage, just pinch the back of it. I take no responsibility for what follows after you do it, though. I'm sure some of you know what that feels like. Having a bee sting you there is a 1000 times worse.

However, it did motivate me to do something good and lead me to an intro on how to 'bee' yourself.  A year ago while living in Lethbridge I gave a talk on this to the yw at their Young Women's in Excellence night where they show off all of their cool projects they did that year. I told them that night and I'll tell you all now, I have as many insecurities as you can possibly imagine.

my blackheads are massive
my hair looks like a poodle
i'm not very funny/witty
i have ugly toes
my mustache grows too fast
my one ear pokes out further than the other
my morning breath is beyond compare
I get defensive too quickly

okay, you don't need to hear anymore. I'm feeling too exposed. I'm not perfect at this, nor do i pretend to be, but all in all as I've grown and graduated from high school, left my small town, and came back again, I've really changed as a person. I'm slowing becoming who I want to be: myself.

Not only do I want to be myself, I want to be my best self. Complacency isn't happiness, so don't get me wrong. There are obviously things I can work on and should work. But the ones that are impossible to change, well, I hate to break it to ya, but they aren't ever going to change. So why not get over it and enjoy life? Thinking about them and comparing yourself to others does nobody any good.

so just bee yourself, whatever that may be.